Tuesday Blues’

I woke up with mild anxiety this morning. I think it has to do with my phone blowing up and not getting enough sleep last night. It was about 3am that I'm aware of before I was even able to sleep. And then suddenly 5 hours later the phone is ringing and buzzing and me … Continue reading Tuesday Blues’

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Airport sanctuary

Today my sister left to collect her friend from another state. She's moving in with us to (hopefully) have a better life and just help her out. I'm excited to have someone else in the house, sometimes we get at each other's throats. I like that though, I feel like we still have some connection. … Continue reading Airport sanctuary

Keeping up with my treatment: med refills, therapy and psychiatrist

Good news from last week! Actually it's more of me feeling good and working out the small stuff, but good overall! Just to catch up on some things- I've been out of therapy since August and I want to go back. Now that I'm working (two jobs!) I hope to get back into in before … Continue reading Keeping up with my treatment: med refills, therapy and psychiatrist

Mental illness feels like: second hand anxiety.

This is the best way I can put this experience to be honest with you. I felt like I was in the backseat in an awkward car ride while a friend was getting yelled at. And I couldn't help but feel that anxiety even though I wasn't the one getting in trouble. Except I wasn't … Continue reading Mental illness feels like: second hand anxiety.

Taking coworkers too seriously.

I'm taking a bathroom break just so I can write this. I'm feeling those ugly feelings like I use too a few months ago. I'm taking offense, I'm getting agitated and having this overpowering feeling to snap at certain people. I'm just so quick to get irritated and annoyed by everything. I don't want to … Continue reading Taking coworkers too seriously.

Mental illness feels like; sleepless nights

As I’m typing this, I’m cautious pacing between the dinning room and the kitchen. I’m subconsciously making my way to the living room as well, which I didn’t know until now. The television is on and it’s agrivating to me. Like my nerves are stretched so thin, I feel as though I much just punch … Continue reading Mental illness feels like; sleepless nights

Mental illness feels like; random panic attacks. 

If you asked me about four years ago, why I would suddenly burst into tears or why I was tearing up, or WHY I was acting so “needy”. I honestly wouldn’t have been able to answer you. I would just say “I’m tired” or “I don’t feel good”. Emotions are just a hair ball, ya … Continue reading Mental illness feels like; random panic attacks. 

Mental illness feels like; late night anxiety. 

Earlier today I was told a comment that destroyed my day. It took me my whole day to shove that comment down and tell it to fuck off.  Sadly, the beldam wanted to fight. Today she didn’t even knock at the door. She crept through the unlocked secret window. I should have locked that damn … Continue reading Mental illness feels like; late night anxiety. 

#MotivationalMonday, The Bigger Picture. 

I don’t know how to explain how I feel right now. It’s not bad, that I can say for sure. I think it’s content? At ease. Relearning emotions has been a challenge for me. What I use to feel when I was significantly (emotionally) sensitive I was in constant flight mode. I was always in … Continue reading #MotivationalMonday, The Bigger Picture.